Robot Detective - Episode 2 - "The Eye-Witness is a Zero"
Episode one of "Robot Detective" was a fun but childish romp. The drama and stakes of a thrilling crime story, fused with the silly antics and over-the-top superheroism of Showa era tokusatsu. In spite of it's flaws, it was a fairly good time with some very memorable moments (and if you haven't already, you should check out my episode one review for context wink wink wink). So, can episode two keep the pace up?
Ehhhh...
Episode two kicks off right where episode one left us; in the midst of Detective K's battle with Wakkaman. And before we have any chance to get settled into the flow of things, the fight ends fairly suddenly.
The two tussle for a bit, with a few new scenes scattered in with some reused footage from episode one. Wakkaman does his cute reassembling trick once again, and Detective K spouts that "There must be a reconstruction device on his body somewhere!" He then grabs him, immediately finds the device on Wakkaman's left breast, and the next time Wakkaman re-assembles he shoots him with a chest-mounted micro-missile of his, blowing Wakkaman to pieces in spectacular fashion.
However, I can't help but be a little disappointed.
I'm under no illusion that Wakkaman would be a mainstay villain or anything, but I figured last episode's cliffhanger meant he'd be sticking around for more than another two minutes. Any time "Kamen Rider (1971)" had a multi-episode antagonist, they took up the entire time slot. And while Wakkaman never really had the stage presence of Kamen Rider (1971)'s Cobra Man or Shinigami Chameleon, he had the potential for some cool fight scenes! The yacht fight didn't really fit into his theming or give him any chance to show-off. Put Wakkaman in a big factory where he can magnetize to the machinery or in a tight complex where he could slip through gaps humans couldn't. That'd be far more engaging in my opinion.
But, fanfic aside, I suppose it's fine enough. Man Spider never got a fancy send-off either...
Detective K runs down below deck, chasing after Date who's boarded himself up in a room. Date refuses to let him in, and asks for proof that Detective K isn't one of those monster guys. Detective K offers him his police notebook, Date's pleased. But before he can open the door, uh oh! Another BAD cyborg got to him through the window, and chokes him out. Detective K breaks down the door, but he's too late.
All Date can do is rattle off some cryptic non-sense before he passes
A police boat approaches the yacht. A guy shouts over the megaphone that Detective K is under arrest for the murder of Date! The thrills!
The very next scene is Detective Shinjo (not Officer Shinjo, I thought there was a rank difference last episode) showing up and telling the police to let Detective K go. The...lack of thrills!
One of my biggest issues with "Robot Detective" is the show's inability to let something sit. I'm not a huge fan of detective media - an episode or two of "Columbo" and a "Detective Dee" film every now and again is about the breadth of my knowledge - but I think one of the genre's highlights is the ability to let loose threads lie. To drop a bunch of questions in the viewers lap and let them play with it for a while. It makes things far more satisfying when the detective solves the case, because they put together something you couldn't.
Detective K being framed for a murder is a fascinating premise. Sure, he'll protest that he's innocent, but he's a robot. No matter what, he'll act calm and accept his fate. This could be a good oppurtunity for Detectives Shiba and Shinjo to search for clues. Finding evidence that could not only benefit the case, but prove Detective K's innocence. And maybe, just maybe, this could bring the three of them together. This could be a catalyst for them working as a team.
Unfortunately for us, Detectives Shiba and Shinjo still hate Detective K and want him to go away. They wouldn't work to free him even if they had the chance. So all Detective Shinjo does is show up, pick Detective K up from his cell, and then cut back to everyone in the broom closet going "Gah! A robot detective? That's stupid!"
And we get more of the same-old drama. Detective Shiba reprimands Detective K, and calls him useless. He's noticeably more hostile this episode, and I'm worried that's how he's going to stay. Detective Shinjo - contrary to his behavior last episode - is more of a mediator between the two now. Softer on Detective K than Shiba is, but still dismissive and infantilizing.
Detectives Shiba and Shinjo leave to go meet up with Shinjo's brother, but Detective K tells them he's solved the mystery of Date's last words. See what I mean about not letting plot threads simmer? Apparently, Date rattled off four different locations on the surface of the moon. And when mapped to the earth (somehow), they all intersect in a random part of Japan. That's where the billion yen is buried. Detective Shinjo tells Detective K that his brother came up with the same solution. A kind of weird plot point but okay. And Detective Shiba tells Detective K that he's not allowed to follow them while they chase after the treasure.
And frankly, I'm getting sick of how many times I've had to say "detective" already.
We rather awkwardly cut to Kuroda digging up two huge metal briefcases filled with money. He lugs them back to his car, and opens them up. The money's inside. While he's celebrating, a voice rings out from his car's radio. A mans voice tells him about the contract, and tells him to give one suitcase to BAD's debt collector. Kuroda looks up, and sees a shady figure approaching the car (Well, I say shady. He's dressed like Dr. Shinigami. Cheap vampire cape and all).
Then, in a sequence straight out of a parody, Kuroda hops into the driver's seat and rams into the debt collector at full speed. Throwing him onto the hood of the car before he rolls off and onto the ground. The debt collector stands up and shouts "Wait!" Kuroda then reverses, and rams into him a second time, leaving the debt collector sprawling on the ground. Kuroda says he'll never give anyone the money, and then drives over him a third time before leaving. And I'm sorry, I was covering my mouth trying not to laugh at all this. It's played completely straight, but this is maybe the funniest series of events I've ever seen in an old tokusatsu show.
But watch out! It only took running over him three times, but now the debt collector's angry! He rips off his cloak and reveals a puffy-looking design that I can only describe as looking like a cooked crab.
The debt collector (who I shall henceforth be referring to as "Tenagaman." We don't know that's his name yet but "debt collector" is a mouth full.) is a bit of a step down from Wakkaman. Nothing about him really stands out all that much.
While Wakkaman was undeniably a simpler costume design, the industrial edge lent it a sort of realness. Any imperfections felt intentional as he was just a bundle of scrap metal. Tenagaman though feels more Asimov-y, like a traditional pre-"Star Wars" robot design, but the costume quality doesn't lend well to that sort of design. Traditional sci-fi robots are generally sleek, metallic, and symmetrical. Tenagaman looks lumpy and soft. Instead of a metal exoskeleton he's got a creased foam suit that bubbles strangely on his body. Instead of distinct plates and rings, he's got wonky and uneven lines. And even in his transport mode, he lacks the kind of aerodynamics that'd really make this kind of design pop.
Wait, did I say transport mode?
Indeed. A tiny little model toy of Tenagaman gets up, extends a singular wheel from his back, and retracts his legs into his torso. Slowly wheeling off after Kuroda, who's currently gunning it in his beater car. Somehow, Tenagaman catches up. And he extends his telescopic arm several meters forward to grab the back of Kuroda's car, causing Kuroda to hop out and try to flee on foot with the suitcases. While adorable, I've got to say that again, this doesn't really feel like any sort of meaningful escalation.
Not to worry, Detectives Shiba and Shinjo are here! They find Kuroda's car, and-oh nevermind Shinjo's brother (now given a name, Keitaro) is here. And he tells them that Kuroda and Tenagaman are nearby. The pair hear gunshots and run off, leaving Keitaro at the car. I'm sorry, why is Keitaro here again? I'm really hoping he's a villain down the road because otherwise every one of these moments is going to be twice as obnoxious in retrospect.
Detectives Shiba and Shinjo clamber up a hill, and yell at Kuroda that he's under arrest for the murders of Okazaki and Date. Kuroda denies his involvement, and claims the robot infront of him did it. Which, I guess is half true? Wakkaman absolutely killed the first guy though. Detective Shinjo remarks that this could be the robot that Detective K was talking about, while Detective Shiba yells at Tenagaman for obstructing officers. After a brief exchange where the two remark that robots are "not the usual at all," they try to arrest Tenagaman. And they can accomplish nothing. He's a robot. He waves his lanky arms around, blows up some rocks, and threatens to kill the two.
In comes Detective K, flying over the hillside in The Joker. He scrambles inbetween Tenagaman and the Detectives, and says that the two of them should chase after Kuroda. Detective Shiba starts to yell at Detective K for ignoring his orders (have I said how much I dislike Shiba? I really don't like Shiba) before Detective Shinjo convinces him to run off.
We get another incredibly abbreviated fight sequence. Tenagaman swings his arm at Detective K, he dodges, and then Tenagaman uses a "sonic gun" to shoot the hillside above. Dropping a pile of rocks onto Detective K. Tenagaman deploys his silly unicycle wheel, and scoots off. Fight scene over in less than a minute.
If it's not already clear, I'm starting to build up a little contempt for this show.
In my (amateurish) opinion, the fights scenes in tokusatsu contain just as much emotional release as the dialogue. Even in the most made-for-kids bottom-of-the-barrel shlock, the fight scenes still play a valuable role in the pacing of an episode. In a good episode, fights let you blow off the tension of the ever-escalating plot. Whether you beat up a bunch of grunts or take on a major boss, it's a cathartic emotional release. You're cheering - or at least smiling - as your favorite little superhero goes into action and defends the innocent. And in a bad episode, it's an incentive to keep watching. Is Nosy No.1 or Kamestone putting you to sleep with their lame intrigue or ineffectual story? Well hey, at least you have a cool fight or two to look forward to.
I know this may sound rather reductive, and I don't mean to insinuate that a good episode of a tokusatsu show needs a fight. But rather that fights play an extremely important role in the story, one that's crucial to get right.
"Robot Detective" doesn't seem to understand that.
On some level, it seems conscious of when a fight should take place. We've gotten a handful of fights each episode, all at sensible moments in the narrative. And it even seems aware of what could make an interesting fight. Wakkaman's reassembly gimmick and Tenagaman's telescopic arms are both versatile gadgets to go up against. But "Robot Detective" seems completely baffled as to how it can make the fights engaging. Most of them end as soon as they begin, simple 1v1s where each side swings, each side grapples, and then a climactic thing happens that ends the fight. And that's not fun.
At the risk of sounding like a disappointed parent, "Kamen Rider (1971)" had Shocker grunts being thrown all over. The Double Riders were swordfighting and wrestling and jumping around cars, while even the human side characters would occasionally flip over a fence or hop on a little wall.
Detective K? Maybe he grabs a guy around the waist, or throws a punch here and there. Hell, that could be an interesting trait if done better! Maybe he's got a more boxing fighting style to match his henshin sequence coat toss. Or maybe he can't fight well, and has to rely on gadgets and intellect to win fights. Maybe he...I'm writing fanfic again, aren't I?
We rather awkwardly cut to Detective K dropping Detective Shiba off at his home. Shiba's daughter (Nami) attempts to invite Detective K inside, but Shiba snaps that he doesn't want that thing in the house. Don't feel sorry for it, it's just a robot, it can't get cold. Presumably he's upset over Tenagaman escaping, but this little bit of hositility isn't really addressed.
But surprise! Hell's Ear is here, and drinking Detective Shiba's sake. Detective Shiba yells at him to get out, Jihei goes to leave before letting slip that he knows Kuroda's current location, and Detective Shiba apologizes and begs for Kuroda's location. Apparently, he's holed up in a random hotel room. With plans to skip the country tomorrow. Nothing of note happens, it's just an excuse to get people where they need to be.
Back to Kuroda, we see him freaking out in his hotel room. He's haunted(?) by a copy of his BAD murder contract, and thinks that BAD are out to get him. He's absolutely correct, as Tenagaman's scaling the outside of the hotel as he rants. But instead of barricading the giant open window or trying to hide in his room, he just picks up the huge suitcases of money and goes to leave.
But before Tenagaman can strike, Detective Shinjo shows up and holds Kuroda at gunpoint. He almost arrests him, but Tenagaman launches a flailing arm into the room. In the chaos, he manages to snag both of the money-filled suitcases. Detective Shinjo goes to the window to look for him, but Kuroda holds him at gunpoint this time.
Oh no, are there consequences for Detective Shinjo's ineptitude? Will he be in danger? Will-Oh Keitaro is here. He tussles with Kuroda, gets his gun, and the two of them take Kuroda in for questioning.
I wish I had more to say, but I'd just be repeating my grievances with the show again and again. The pacing is rough to begin with, the fights and stressful moments are already fairly short, and Keitaro being a random super genius who shows up whenever anyone needs any help undermines any real stakes. Not just that, it undermines the characters agency. We don't get to see Detectives Shinjo or Shiba solve any problems or find their way out of sticky situations. They just do the bare minimum, counting on Keitaro to bail them out whenever the going gets tough.
Anyway, it turns out that Detective K was waiting outside the building and he's hot on the tail of Tenagaman.
Tenagaman drives out into the middle of nowhere, radioing for a BAD money transfer on the way. He hops out of the car, dressed in his silly little Dr. Shinigami robes, and when he sees the helicopter he waves them down.
The helicopter flies overhead, and drops two ropes beneath it. Tenagaman secures the suitcases to the ropes, and the BAD goons (no given term for them yet) hoist the suitcases up into the air. From the little glimpses we get, their designs are actually quite cool. They've got black trench coats and hats, with dark sunglasses that cover their eyes and tattered white cloth wrapped around their face, hiding any skin. They look formidable and a little scary, and that's good!
But wait! Detective K is here!
He jumps for the helicopter, and tries to climb on. But Tenagaman's telescopic arm grabs his leg, and manages to pull him off of the craft. Oh no!
The two square up for a fight with the helicopter flying off in the background, and Tenagaman gleefully shouts that since his bill collection job is over, he'll take his time ripping apart Detective K. To that? Detective K says that he won't let Tenagaman get away with the one billion yen. But...what can Detective K possibly do?
Oh?!
Yes, in a move that feels incredibly unheroic, Detective K reveals that he planted a bomb on the helicopter when he grabbed onto it. The helicopter, the one billion yen, and though they're never acknowledged again, the two goons that were on that helicopter are all nothing but ash now. And...is this really okay?
I get "Robot Detective" wants to be a little noir-y with it. It wants a little bit of a darker, mature tone. It has guns, it has dark scenes with harsh lighting, and it has antagonistic allies that don't work well together. But I don't know, something about this just really rubs me the wrong way. It doesn't feel like a heroic outcome in any sense. In fact, it makes Detective K look rather malicious. Not to be "girl who's only seen "Kamen Rider (1971)" voice" but the violence in that usually fit the crime. Random grunts would just get beat up or tossed around. Major enemies or cyborgs were usually the only ones who died, and even then, they were robots. All of them could be - and sometimes were - rebuilt.
Don't get me wrong, it's a great comedic moment. The shock of Detective K just killing these guys is another "hand over mouth trying not to laugh" situation. But like, this isn't what I want to see him do. I want to see him sneak a tracking device onto the helicopter and have Detectives Shiba and Shinjo try to intercept it. I want this to be another one of his failures, and something that plays into his lack of experience or strained relationship with Detective Shiba. Something. Because killing these guys feels like nothing.
Detective K tries to interrogate Tenagaman, but the latter refuses to say anything. The two then have a fight, and do I even need to tell you that it's rushed?
Detective K throws off his jacket for his dorky little henshin sequence. Tenagaman swings at him a few times, and manages to grab him. Tenagaman screams "die with me!" before attempting to crash into his car with Detective K. But Detective K escapes in the nick of time, with both Tenagaman and the car going up in flames.
The final fight clocks in at a minute-thirty. And we don't even get a cool cameo from Mother this time.
From here, everything wraps up fairly quickly. Detectives Shiba and Shinjo are pissed that Detective K blew up a billion yen, because yeah of course they are. Detective Shinjo stands up for Detective K, and assures Detective Shiba (I've used the word Detective over a hundred times this html file, sorry) that at least they got Kuroda and this whole case can end. Detective Shiba smiles, and the two leave to go get a beer.
Detective K pulls up and offers to drive the two. Detective Shiba is hesitant, but Detective Shinjo insists that he take the ride. His legs aren't what they used to be, after all. But before they can get in the car, Detective K hears the sounds of a robot! And it's in Kuroda's cell! We get a scene of a dark shadow looming over Kuroda. His cell door unlocks, he screams, then falls limp.
The three race back, but they're too late. Detective K asks Kuroda who did this to him, and he leaves them with just one word: BAD.
Final thoughts: Episode two - "The Eye-Witness is a Zero" - felt far weaker than the first one, and I'm not sure why. A lot of my critiques and concerns after episode one were not only unresolved, but amplified in some way. It's a detective show that doesn't feel comfortable letting mysteries lie. It's a tokusatsu show that either can't afford or won't have thrilling fight scenes. And it's a kid's show that wants to feel adult but only in the most surface level ways.
If episode one of "Robot Detective" was a delicious appetizer, then this was the lackluster entree. You'll eat it, sure. And it's giving you enough enjoyment that you're not upset or demanding a refund or anything. But part of you is kinda wishing that you got dinner someplace else.
5/10